Friday, December 11, 2009

The dog bit my imaginary friend

Let me start with this: No bones were broken. No blood was shed.

Today, I was hit with "Daddy Daddy Daddy, the dog bit my imaginary friend!" Thank goodness I was there to deal with this crisis immediately. Like any good parent, I raced upstairs and to take a look at the wound. It took us a few minutes to locate the injured imaginary friend (it's not easy trying to track down an invisible person in a 10X14 space). It seems that the imaginary friend was playing rough with our dog (who oddly enough was napping on the stairs) and was bit on the thumb toe. NOTE: Ian (the 5 year old) has a pretend Harvard medical degree and assured me that "thumb toe" is the technical term for the big toe. I was concerned that the imaginary friend's days of wearing imaginary sandals were over...but almost as quickly as the thumb toe was bit, it healed. Call me crazy but I don't think the dog actually bit an imaginary friend's thumb toe. I believe the imaginary friend made up the whole thing to get attention. Faker! Sherlock Holmes has spoken.

For any potential future situations like this, I thought it would be a good idea to review our homeowners policy. Sadly, there is no clause protecting us against injuries to imaginary friends. USAA said they can add imaginary friend liability coverage to our policy, but it's quite costly, because of the high volume of claims. I'd hate to get sued and lose our house to a person that does not exist. I consulted Ian, who also has a pretend law degree from Harvard, and he suggested that I purchase the coverage, unless the expediture will reduce the number of presents he will receive on Christmas.

Until next time, buh bye.

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